Personal Growth For Each Myers Briggs Personality Type

You have only one life to live and what you get out of it largely depends on your ability to grow and develop as a person. Each of us has a unique story and life path to follow and along the way will come challenges that reveal our strengths and expose our weaknesses. Using the MBTI, we can learn to recognize aspects of our personality that are underdeveloped and then work to improve them. Recognizing your cognitive weak points is the first step in fortifying them but you can also take some solace knowing that other people with your MBTI type share your struggle. Here is a look at some of the areas in which each MBTI personality type can focus on improving to be the best they can be.

“The first half of life is devoted to forming a healthy ego, the second half is going inward and letting go of it.” — Carl Jung

INTP Personal Growth

INTP’s creative drive and exploration of new possibilities is in part motivated by an underlying fear of running out of options and becoming stuck in a rut. INTPs want to achieve something of significance, they want to progress in whatever they do and do things they consider to be worthwhile. They prefer not to work in teams but when they do, studies have shown that their self-oriented individualism can clash with team player expectations. They generally want to succeed or fail on their own terms and by their own merit.

INTPs have the ability to create unique opportunities for themselves but problem is, they often move from one idea to the next without actually putting anything into action. Lack of follow-through, procrastination, and laziness may prevent the INTP from fully realizing their potential. INTPs may have a lot of ambition and ingenuity but their enthusiasm evaporates like the morning dew when it comes to time-consuming, tedious drudgery and meticulous detail work. They may do well to team up with an SJ who can tend to these logistic details so the INTP can be free to go wherever their intuition leads them.

INTPs hate repetitive tasks

In order to make progress on any long term goals and reap the rewards, they will likely have to pump up their patience and understand that there is no substitute for hard work no matter how tedious or thankless it may be. INTPs prefer to paint with a broad brush. Even though they can be very particular and exacting in terms of articulating and refining their arguments and ideas, INTPs tend not to exhibit the same level of detail when it comes to performing physical tasks. They can be very unfocused and undisciplined about proofreading and editing their work and may skip ahead or gloss over important details and problems.

INTPs tend to have difficulty in managing their emotions

in real-time as they experience them and instead choose to repress or ignore those feelings and set them aside for later consideration. This contributes to a build up of resentments and regrets over perceived slights and offenses, or missed opportunities they did not address because they were not mentally “in the moment” at the time they occurred. When INTPs are immersed in their primary mode of introverted thinking, they are generally detached from the external world and oblivious to much of what happens to and around them. Unexpected situations and remarks can catch them off guard and evoke an emotional response they are not prepared to express. INTPs instinctively avoid reacting emotionally because they don’t want to look foolish.

Inferior Fe may contribute to feelings of isolation

despite the INTP’s preference for quiet and solitude. They have difficulty wrangling and making sense of what they feel and they may exhibit emotional immaturity for much of their lives. This lag or disconnect in their emotional development may also affect their relationships. While INTPs may experience strong feelings for their partners while away from them, they may not experience those emotions or may have trouble communicating them while together in their presence.

INTPs may avoid people more often than they’d like to simply because of habit, the amount of effort it requires, and the risk of rejection. Despite this, INTPs should not neglect the human need to find other humans with whom they can interact and connect with as part of a well-balanced and healthy social life.

Tips for INTP Growth

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1. Figure out how you feel about the other person. Do not falsely express love, or lead someone on with your ambivalence.

2. Don’t expect yourself to be a master at the “touchy-feely” game. Be yourself, but remember that there is a basic assumption of human decency that must be adhered to in relationships. If you’re not sure what that means, take special care to observe how people in “good” committed relationships behave towards each other, so that you can determine where the lines are drawn.

3. Pair yourself with an Extraverted Thinker (ESTJ or ENTJ) who is less likely to assume that the lack of feedback is the same thing as negative feedback.

4. Realize and accept that for you a satisfying relationship will start with the head, and move on towards the heart.

5. Expanding your world and experiences will expand your understanding of human expectations. Try to figure out the personality type of people that you know and encounter in your life.

6. Take care to notice what people look like in different social situations. Notice their hair, makeup (or lack thereof), the condition of their clothes, their shoes, their facial expressions. Don’t compare others to your own appearance, simply take notice of it.

7. When having a conversation with a friend or relative, spend at least half of the time talking about them. Concentrate on really understanding where the person is coming from with their concerns. Ask questions.

8. Think of the people who are closest to you. Remember that they have their own lives going on. Try to visualize what that person is doing, and imagine what kinds of things that person is thinking about. Don’t pass judgement, just think about it.

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INTJ Personal Growth

Many INTJs may have difficulty in tolerating what they perceive as weakness and incompetence in others. They exhibit a lack of concern or respect for feeling-based perspectives especially when the INTJ is under stress. They may need to learn not to quickly dismiss or devalue the opinions of people they disagree with.

INTJs can become arrogant at times

and believe themselves to be always right and convinced that others with opposing views are either too obtuse to grasp their point or just willfully ignorant. They can be inclined to find fault in others while being blind to any culpability of their own. They may form unrealistic expectations of other people and become overly critical and derisive.

INTJs tend not to care about superficial tokens of status or image and may be unaware or care little about how they come across. They can spend excessive amounts of time in their heads and often feel isolated or detached from the physical world. It can be all too easy for INTJs to shut out people and avoid external influence, advice, and important details that conflict with their perspective (tunnel vision). Sometimes they make incorrect inferences due to ignoring concrete facts and have difficulty living in the present due to future-oriented focus. It is advisable that they work on being more adaptable to changes in external circumstances and use physical/sensual activities to relax rather than to escape stress.

INTJs may hold grudges and have difficulty forgiving people.

They tend to be drawn to people with weak J attitude as a way to feel superior through advising/counseling others.They have difficulty engaging with subjects that are not personally meaningful to them and can become inaccessible/obsessive when engaged with their passionate interests excluding others from their activities or quests for knowledge.

It is important for INTJs to engage in the present moment so as not to miss fresh objective data that can keep their perspectives up to date and consistent with reality. It is also useful in counterbalancing their insular habits that can lead to developing unhealthy distorted and neurotic ideations conjured up by Ni run amok.

Tips For INTJ Growth

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1. Take care to listen to someone’s idea entirely before you pass judgment on it. Ask questions if necessary. Do whatever it takes to make sure that you understand the idea. Try not to begin judging anything about the idea until you have understood it entirely.

2. Before you begin talking to another person, pause for a moment and look at that person. Take in that person’s attitude and feelings at that moment. Be aware of the person with whom you’re speaking.

3. If you become upset, walk away immediately. DO NOT express anger. When you get angry, you lose. After you have calmed down, apologize for leaving and continue with what you were doing.

4. Try to identify the personality type of everyone that you encounter frequently in your life. Remember that people with the Sensing preference need to be communicated with in a direct, concise manner. Speak plainly and simply with Sensors, giving “yes” or “no” answers.

5. Try to be on good terms with all people, even those that you consider beneath you. Try to understand that everybody has something to offer.

6. When you make judgments or decisions, try to be aware of your motivation for making the judgment. Are you more interested in finding fault externally, or in improving your own understanding? Seek first to understand, and then to judge.

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ENTP Personal Growth

ENTPs may be guilty of inattention to pragmatic details and may display an irreverence for established methods and procedures. Because their creative egos are focused on novelty and exploring new and better ways of doing things, they may disregard or ignore the current means and procedures and attempt to introduce a revolutionary approach that is all their own. This tendency to overcomplicate or over-think things unnecessarily can result in wasted time and making tasks more difficult than they need to be.

ENTPs may have difficulty learning from their past failures

and may be in denial over facts that threaten the tenability of their ideas. They may often feel restricted by their reality and circumstances and will always explore alternate perspectives and ideas that allow them to modify and shape their situations. However, in the process of progressing forward, they may fail to internalize or take seriously important lessons from their mistakes. In a foolhardy way, they land themselves in the same hot water time and time again because they are too willing to gamble and take the same risks for a big payoff.

A lack of focus and discipline

may hold ENTPs back from doing better in life. The ENTP can be very scattered and without clear direction in sorting out their priorities and are occasionally indecisive. They can get so caught up with their quixotic ideations, and with mentally stimulating activities that they neglect many of the banal but important matters in need of attention such as house chores and responsibilities unrelated to their core interests. They may also lack thoroughness and patience and are prone to making careless mistakes due to disregard for fine details. In addition, ENTPs may also lack a health conscious mindset and may need to look after themselves better in terms of healthy diet and exercise.

ENTPs can come across as arrogant know-it-alls

who have an answer for everything. People can be put off by this and their lack of sensitivity to other’s feelings. ENTPs have a penchant for speaking their mind and may often blurt out offensive or ill-thought out remarks that offend others without their realizing it. For this reason, ENTPs should consider reflecting more on the things they say beforehand in order to mitigate the damage they cause with careless words.

Tips for ENTP Growth

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1. Take time to really listen to the thoughts of others and try to see how they understand the world. Think about the ways in which your view of the world and your needs can mesh with theirs.

2. Don’t expect others to simply follow you or expect that they should see what you can see as a worthy goal. A good exercise is to imagine yourself as a blind or severely disabled person. Try to get the feel of what it would be like to have to organize your life from such a different perspective. Would your goals still be valid? Would they need re-thinking? Consider the possibility that while your way of thinking leads you to see other types as having limited vision or ability, the truth is that they are no more limited than yourself, but simply have a differing focus in life and differing needs.

3. Realize and accept that for you a satisfying relationship will require you to attend to the small details of life and show an awareness of your partner’s feelings. You might find this difficult, but it will pay the biggest dividends in return for your effort.

4. Expanding your appreciation of the differences between people will expand your understanding of human expectations. Try to figure out the personality type of people that you know and encounter in your life.

5. Take care to listen to what people express within different social and work situations. Notice the different ways they go about their dealings with others or solving their problems. Do not try to compare or judge their ways against your own, simply try to recognize the many ways it is possible to be at peace in the world.

6. When having a conversation with a friend or relative, spend at least half of the time talking about them. Concentrate on really understanding where the person is coming from with their concerns. Ask questions.

7. Think of the people who are closest to you. Remember that they have their own passions, satisfactions and needs. Try to visualize what that person is doing, and narrow down to how they are feeling at this moment; to one thing they might be thinking about. Don’t pass judgment, just consider and reflect on why they might think or feel in just such a way.

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ENTJ Personal Growth

[dropcap]M[/dropcap]any ENTJs may find it difficult to understand other people’s needs that differ from their own and may take decisions not made in agreement with their rational beliefs as a personal rejection. Conversely, they may be easily taken in or manipulated by others who do agree with their rational attitudes.

ENTJs may have trouble living in the moment

and may rely too much on external sources for moral guidance and in constructing their sense of self. They tend to dismiss individual needs or priorities as selfish and focus too much on obligations in the external world. They often believe only their own view of the world or a situation is correct, and show difficulty understanding that making good choices always involves some form of personal subjectivity or knowledge of the subjective experiences of other people.

ENTJs can overburden themselves

with managerial-like responsibilities but their high pressure to conform to objective standards can lead to eruptions of irresponsible, impulsive, or self-indulgent behaviors. They may become childishly petulant or angered when confronted by situations which require feeling judgments. They can be inflexible and often cannot see that there is more than one way to establish order.

ENTJs are often uncomfortable with ambiguity, unpredictability, or unknowns and can appear negative, controlling, or overly critical to others difficulty reexamining/readjusting standards that in their minds have been “universalized”. They can be insensitive and tend to overgeneralize standards of human relationship, ignoring context and individual needs/differences. They may feel as though others are ever plotting against them and can become obsessed with small obstructions and difficulties in their plans.

Tips for ENTJ Growth

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1. When confronted by a situation which requires an important decision, try to put it off for long enough to be able to sit quietly with it. In doing so allow yourself to feel and see the images which arise in your mind regarding this situation. Try to set aside those which appear immediately as the products of your own beliefs and thinking, and regard the others closely. If these images and ideas were the opinions of people whose judgment you trusted implicitly, try to question them in your mind and find the reasons why they consider things in such a way.

2. There are some people around you who always seem to know just which way to go or how things work or what the outcome of a certain situation will be without them seeming to have sufficient information to be able to do so. These people are intuitive types and their world is full of possibilities which they can immediately recognize as apt to certain situations. You also have this talent, but you have a habit of not following it, rather you prefer to think it out and find the options which “ought” to be correct. I placed ought in quotes for a very good reason here, for you know yourself how often things have developed in the direction you had an inkling of, but refused to accept without thinking. Try to let these immediate impressions have their moment and recognize them as true possibilities which ought to be examined more closely. Understand that they are not baseless images and ideas but rely upon valid sources of information which you simply screen out of your life by habit.

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INFP Personal Growth

[dropcap]M[/dropcap]any INFPs have difficulty with fitting in due to their rejection of outside standards. They tend to struggle with many inner conflicts or low self-esteem and feel adrift if they cannot express their values into the world. They may be extremely sensitive to any kind of criticism and
may perceive criticism where none was intended. INFPs can have difficulty acknowledging or hearing anything that goes against their personal ideas and opinions and are prone to being easily offended if people do not share the same values.

INFPs can also have difficulty in maintaining close relationships,

due to unreasonable expectations of others. They may be oblivious to other people’s need and unaware of how their behavior affects others. They can be somewhat self-centered and self-righteous valuing their own opinions and feelings far above others. They may have difficulty understanding that making good choices involves using external standards and measurements of success/failure. INFPs should be more realistic in their goals/expectations in order to avoid undue stress/anxiety

INFPs should try to understand the strengths and weaknesses of Fi

so that they can learn to see themselves more accurately and adjust their vision when necessary. It is important for them to reflect on how their relentless need to use their own experience as a frame of reference affects them and the people around them. INFPs should accept that they have a need for achievement and competence, and then work on building up the skills required to reach their goals. They should avoid being too harsh on themselves and others by moderating their idealism through collecting more facts/details before forming decisions.

INFPs may be oblivious to their personal appearance,

or to appropriate dress and may be unaware of appropriate social behavior. They may come across as eccentric, or perhaps even generally strange to others, without being aware of it. May have great anger, and show this anger with rash outbursts and also blame their problems on other people, seeing themselves as victims who are treated unfairly. INFPs should analyze their own values, standards, and self-image to make sure that they are healthy and reasonable, otherwise it will lead them further and further astray from their own well-being.

Tips for INFP Growth

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1. Take care to notice what people look like in different social situations. Look at their hair, their skin, their makeup (or lack thereof), their clothes, the condition of their clothes, their shoes, their facial expressions. Don’t compare others to your own appearance, or pass judgment on their appearance, simply take in the information.

2. Think of a situation in your life in which you weren’t sure how to behave. Now try to understand how one or two other people would see the situation. Don’t compare their behavior to your own, i.e. “she would know better than me what to do”, or “why is it so easy for her, but so hard for me”. Rather, try to understand how they would see the situation. Would it be seen as a problem, or as an opportunity? Would it be taken seriously or lightly? Try to determine their point of view without passing judgment or comparing it to your own.

3. When having a conversation with a friend or relative, dedicate at least half of your time to talking about the other person. Concentrate on really understanding where that person is coming from with their concerns. Ask questions.

4. Think of the people who are closest to you. As you think of each person, tell yourself “this person has their own life going on, and they are more concerned with their own life than they are with mine.” Remember that this doesn’t mean that they don’t care about you. It’s the natural order of things. Try to visualize what that person is doing right now. What things are they encountering, what thoughts are they having? Don’t pass judgment, or compare their situation to your own.

5. Try to identify the personality type of everyone that you come into contact with for any length of time.

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INFJ Personal Growth

Some INFJs may hold grudges, and have difficulty forgiving people. Their expectations of others can be unrealistic or unreasonable at times and have a tendency to believe they are always right. They may also have difficulty maintaining healthy relationships because of this. INFJs may apply their judgment more often towards others, rather than towards themselves and make incorrect inferences due to ignoring concrete facts. They can be guilty of having tunnel vision and avoid external influence, dismissing advice, with a tendency to overlook important details that conflict with their perspective.

INFJs may need to work on being more adaptable

to changes in external circumstances. They should work on using Se to support Ni by collecting evidence/experience of the physical world and avoid making incorrect intuitive connections without enough facts. It is advisable that they become more aware of the intuitive process so that they can know themselves more objectively and communicate their thoughts, ideas, or feelings clearly to others.

INFJs may be indecisive

and self-doubting when time to act in situations that require quick decision making. They may see so many tangents that they get distracted and obsessed with details that may be unimportant to the big picture. Alternately, their future-minded orientation makes it difficult to live in the present.

INFJs have difficulty engaging with subjects that are not personally meaningful

and they should make an effort to reflect on how their relentless need to analyze meaning or pursue future goals affects them and the people around them. They should make efforts to genuinely understand and build up the natural strengths of Se and use physical/sensual activities to relax rather than to escape stress. They can appear neurotic, arrogant, aloof, or uptight and setting more realistic goals for themselves can help to avoid undue stress or anxiety.

Tips for INFJ Growth

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1. Take care to listen to someone’s idea entirely before you pass judgment on it. Ask questions if neccesary. Do whatever it takes to make sure that you understand the idea. Try not to begin judging anything about the idea until you have understood it entirely.

2. Before you begin talking to another person, pause for a moment and look at that person. Take in that person’s attitude and feelings at that moment. Be aware of the person with whom you’re speaking.

3. If you become upset, walk away immediately. DO NOT express anger. When you get angry, you lose. After you have calmed down, apologize for leaving and continue with what you were doing.

4. Try to identify the personality type of everyone that you encounter frequently in your life. Remember that people with the Sensing preference need to be communicated with in a direct, concise manner. Speak plainly and simply with Sensors, giving “yes” or “no” answers.

5. Try to be on good terms with all people, even those that you consider beneath you. Try to understand that everybody has something to offer.

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ENFP Personal Growth

Many ENFPs can get themselves into dangerous situations because they are too eager to push the envelope of their understanding, and not willing to apply judgment to anything. They have difficulty with managing details carefully or learning methodically and sometimes make faulty inferences or pursue unrealistic ideas. ENFPs can have tunnel vision when they are taken by an idea/possibility and tend to overlook personal needs or priorities because of excessive attention paid to external events and

Some ENFPs may get involved with drugs, alcohol, or promiscuity, and generally seek mindless experiences and sensations. They often do not invest enough in material stability or security may have difficulty keeping a job for any length of time. They are often susceptible to manipulation by schemers and con artists.

ENFPs may often start projects but are unable to finish them.

They are more interested in exploring potential than realizing potential and can get too easily bored, often abandoning plans midstream. They can be impulsive, impatient, and scattered and should try to find completion before moving on to a new idea. They ought to spend more time developing the details of their inner vision and understand that, rather than slowing you down, taking time to focus, think, and plan more carefully actually increases their chance of success or achievement.

ENFPs May skip from relationship to relationship

without the ability to commit. They may blame their problems on other people and feel intense anger towards people who criticize them or try to control them. Left unexpressed, the anger may fester, simmer, and become destructive and they may develop strong negative judgments that are difficult to unseat against people who they perceive have been oppressive to them.

Tips for ENFP Growth

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1. When you feel angry or resistant toward someone who you feel is criticizing you, take this as a cue that you are not judging effectively. When that happens, take a step back from your anger and try to really hear what the person is saying objectively. Rather than expending mental energy in defining how the other person is wrong, try to judge what the person is actually saying, without respect to yourself.

2. Periodically make lists of goals and accomplishments. Revisit your goals and accomplishments often to maintain a sense of direction.

3. Spend time alone regularly for the purpose of thinking through issues in your life.

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ENFJ Personal Growth

Some ENFJs have difficulty understanding that you cannot always satisfy everyone and making good choices often involves careful analysis and choosing well between competing interests. They may feel a sense of guilt about focusing on their own needs and tend to dismiss personal priorities as selfish and instead focus too much on obligations in the external world. ENFJs need to remember to take enough time to focus on themselves and their psychological well-being and appreciate the value of solitary activities such as studying, writing, or various arts.

ENFJs should focus on using Ti consciously

to present ideas or concepts in systematic order and to build confidence by accumulating useful knowledge. When unsure of themselves, ENFJs should seek out advice or feedback, but consider it with an open mind and analyze the information for themselves. Reflect on mistakes/problems and confront the real causes no matter how uncomfortable and when feeling underappreciated or taken for granted, they should find ways to express those feelings constructively rather than allowing them to fester into some destructive form.

ENFJs can appear overbearing

in coercing people to adhere to social rules/values and need to recognize that social values can be restrictive and force people into unnecessary conformity. They should reflect on how their relentless need to focus on relationships at the expense of other important areas of life affects their lives and the people around them. They can develop their use of Ti by envisioning, recalling, or experiencing real-life scenarios where Ti is more capable or effective than Fe at handling reality. This will help them learn to consciously and comfortably choose the most adaptive behaviors.

Tips for ENFJ Growth

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1. When confronted by a person or situation which seems to be rejecting or rebuffing your value judgements and your mind filling with all the arguments, images and alternatives to the situation, look closely at those you are immediately rejecting as negative or unsuitable ways to proceed. Within these images often lie paths to understanding and agreement if you look more closely. Some of these images hold the key to seeing another’s feelings and point of view more clearly. Remember, what seems positive to you may not be everything or even important to another.

2. Behind everything of value that you see lies much potential. Try not to be satisfied with just a good result, but let yourself imagine the ways in which a person might fulfil all their creative aspects; the ways in which a situation might become useful to many more than just what it was made for. Try to imagine everything as a source of untapped magic and creative power – let your mind see all the things it might become. Above all, apply this exercise to yourself, as if you were seeing yourself in a mirror: just as you would another person whom you love.

3. When you are alone try to become fully aware of how it feels to you, try to recognise the emptiness as a place of potential, try to imagine what you might be able to do for others in this empty time, try to realise that you are not truly alone but with this special person who is yourself. What would you do for this person if you could make their private world a better place?

4. Everything wonderful in life proceeds from the qualities which lie behind it. You can feel these things, these drives and attitudes which seem to come from a place outside, perhaps from the creator expressing himself within people and nature. Letting the sense of these background qualities permeate your drive to life will give you purpose and meaning. Allow yourself to feel the meanings and purposes of the world, let them become a valuable gift which can be expressed in your dealings with others and in the things you strive for.

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ISTJ Personal Growth

ISTJs may develop an excessive love of food and drink and an interest in other people, or in relating to them. They have trouble enjoying the moment due to fear of the future and can become slaves to their routines and “by the book” ways of doing things. ISTJs can have a very narrow mind set that only attends to information that is useful to themselves. They may often dismiss other’s opinions and perspectives, before really understanding them and look at external ideas and people with the primary purpose of finding fault.

ISTJs are often uncomfortable with change and uncertainty and can appear inflexible, dull and rigid. They stick to their own plans, sometimes irrationally, even when the results come out negatively may have difficulty understanding that making good choices involves careful consideration of future possibilities and finding better methods.

ISTJs can sometimes be too self sacrificing

and can overburden themselves with helping others and neglect their own health. They can be untrusting of other’s reliability and generally prefer to handle details themselves rather than delegate and will also forcefully take over others’ responsibilities. They place high demands on themselves and are easily embarrassed by their mistakes because they are concerned with appearing “proper”. They can be overly risk averse and have difficulty integrating knowledge that is seen as “unnecessary” or “unrealistic“.

ISTJs need to learn to use Ne consciously

to express ideas about the future and the meaning of life events and also to change course midstream whenever circumstances require you them do so. They can broaden their perspective by learning to be more accepting of new ideas or different methods of approaching tasks/problems. They should also relax their need for control by being more flexible in your relationships and allow others to be themselves and learn from their own mistakes.

Tips for ISTJ Growth

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1. Take care to listen to someone’s idea entirely before you pass judgment on it. Ask questions if necessary. Do whatever it takes to make sure that you understand the idea. Try not to begin judging anything until you understand the details.

2. Try to identify the personality type of everyone you encounter frequently in your life. Remember that Intuitives often have a wandering style of expression. Try to exhibit tolerance for this.

3. Before you being talking to another person, pause for a moment and look at that person. Take in that person’s attitude and feelings at that moment. Be aware of the person with whom you are speaking.

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ISFJ Personal Growth

ISFJs may have trouble enjoying the moment due to fear of the future and are uncomfortable with change, uncertainty, and ambiguity. They can be overly fussy and hypersensitive if people do not honor the same principles/values as they do. They may find difficulty in expressing their feelings without fear or anger and may often wrongly suspect others of having hidden motives or agendas.

ISFJs generally attend only to practical information

that is useful to themselves and have difficulty understanding that making good choices involves careful consideration of future possibilities and finding better methods. They prefer to handle details themselves rather than delegate and stick to their own plans, sometimes irrationally, even when the results come out negatively. They may be unnecessarily harsh or strict about appropriate social behaviour and unable to acknowledge or hear anything that goes against their certainty about the “correct” or “right” way to do things.

ISFJs should learn to use Ne adaptively

to change course midstream whenever circumstances require them to do so. Ne can help to support Si by anticipating the new memories that can be formed from positive future experiences and avoid becoming obsessed with negative possibilities. They can be very self-sacrificing and feel guilty about taking time to themselves, sometimes overburdening themselves with helping others at the expense to their own health.

ISFJs are highly sensitive to criticism

and easily embarrassed by doing the “wrong thing” or appearing improper according to the prevailing group standard. They can be hypochondriacs who overreact in response to perceived impending disaster. They may have a tendency to blame others for disturbing or upsetting “their world” by simply being who they are. May be unable to understand verbal logic, and quickly cut off other’s explanations. May hold a false belief in their influence upon and understanding of others and may react with anger or distress when someone expresses disagreement with their view of the world, or disapproval of their judgements. Instead of using past experience to lock themselves into a box, they should use Si as a comparison for understanding how to improve themselves for the future. They should broaden their perspective by learning to be more accepting of new ideas or different methods of approaching tasks/problems.

Tips for ISFJ Growth

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1. Take care to try and discover why others feel the way they do. Try to notice the connections between their feelings and the way they see the world. Don’t immediately compare your own value judgements about the world to theirs; simply accept that for them this is a real and perfectly valid way of responding.

2. Think of those times and situations in your life when you felt misunderstood or disregarded by others. Now try to understand how one or two other people would see the situation. Don’t try to assume they would judge as you do: “she would have to feel the same way if that happened to her”, or “he would change his tune if he saw things from my point of view”. Rather, try to understand how they would truly see the situation. Would it be seen as a problem, or as an opportunity? Would it be taken seriously or lightly? Try to determine their point of view without passing judgment or comparing it to your own.

3. When having a conversation with a friend or relative, dedicate at least half of your time to finding out how the other person feels about what they are describing. Concentrate on really sensing their emotional state. Tell them how you feel and compare. Ask questions about why they feel as they do.

4. Think of the people who are closest to you. As you think of each person, tell yourself “this person has their own life going on, and they are more concerned with their own life than they are with mine.” Remember that this doesn’t mean that they don’t care about you. It’s the natural order of things. Try to visualize what that person is feeling right now. What emotions are they enacting, what thoughts are they having? Don’t pass judgment, or compare their situation to your own.

5. Try to identify the personality type of everyone that you come into contact with for any length of time.

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ESTJ Personal Growth

ESTJs may be unaware or uncaring of how they come across to others. They can be quick to dismiss input from others without really considering it and may deliberately bully people into behaving a certain way. ESTJs tend to view individual needs or priorities as selfish and focus too much on obligations in the external world. They may have difficulty understanding that making good choices always involves some form of personal subjectivity or knowledge of the subjective experiences of other people.

ESTJs may be overly judgemental

and tend to hold grudges finding it difficult to forgive people. They may be unable to shrug off feelings that others are not “competent people”. ESTJs may have a hard time understanding the importance of considering people’s feelings, and trying to meet their emotional needs. They tend to overgeneralize standards of human relationship, ignoring context and individual needs/differences and have difficulty seeing that unquestioned standards can promote bias, prejudice, or discrimination. They have an intense and quick temper and can become spiteful and extremely intractable in the face of feeling based reasoning.

ESTJs can be highly controlling

and unable to acknowledge anything that goes against their certainty about the “correct” or “right” way to do things. They may have a tendency to attribute their own problems to arbitrary and unprovable notions about the way people “ought” to behave. They can overburden themselves with managerial-like responsibilities and feel high pressure to conform to objective standards can lead to eruptions of irresponsible, impulsive, or self-indulgent behaviors.

Tips for ESTJ Growth

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1. Try to gather all available facts before you pass judgement. Ask questions if necessary. Make sure that you are understanding the idea that is being communicated. After you understand the idea, figure out how it fits into your principle system.

2. Be willing to create new principles and change existing principles based on new facts.

3. If you become angry, walk away. When you allow anger to control your actions, you lose, and quite possibly somebody else loses too. After you have dealt with your anger and calmed down, continue with what you were doing.

4. Try to identify the personality type of everyone that you encounter frequently in your life. Remember that Intuitives sometimes speak in an indirect, wandering way. Try to have patience with this, and remember that everyone has something to offer.

5. Remember that you have the most to learn from those people who are very different from you. They have something to offer you, no matter how difficult it may be for you to see it at first.

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ESFJ Personal Growth

ESFJs may be unable to correctly judge what really is for the best and at a loss when confronted with situations that require basic technical expertise or clear thinking. Verbal logic is not their strong suit, and in debate they quickly cut off other’s explanations rather than provide a counter argument. ESFJs may be oblivious to all but their own viewpoint, and unable to understand that of others.

ESFJs may be falsely convinced

of the true needs and feeling of others. They rely too much on external sources for moral direction and in constructing their sense of self. ESFJs may be extremely vulnerable to superstitions, religious cults, and irrational beliefs. They are uncomfortable with conflict, dissent, or disagreement and tend to react too quickly and too emotionally in situations better dealt with in a more pragmatic fashion.

ESFJs need to be able to reflect

on mistakes/problems and confront the real causes no matter how uncomfortable. They tend to dismiss personal needs or priorities as selfish and have difficulty seeing that social values can be restrictive and force people into unnecessary conformity. Making good choices often involves careful analysis and choosing well between competing interests. They can sometimes appear overbearing, intrusive, or meddlesome to others and make unrealistic attempts at satisfying everyone.

ESFJs would do well to remember

to take enough time to attend to their own needs and psychological well-being and appreciate the value of solitary activities such as studying, writing, or various arts. They can use Ti consciously to present ideas or concepts in systematic order to build confidence by accumulating useful knowledge. When they feel unsure of themselves, they should seek out advice or feedback, but consider it with an open mind and analyze the information for themselves.

1. Take care to try and discover how others see things. Try to notice the connections they make between ideas and objects. Don’t immediately compare your own vision of things to theirs; simply accept that for them the world fits together in a valid way.

2. Think of those times and situations in your life when you felt misunderstood or disregarded by others. Now try to understand how one or two other people would see the situation. Don’t try to assume they would judge as you do: “she would have to feel the same way if that happened to her”, or “he would change his tune if he saw things from my point of view”. Rather, try to understand how they would truly see the situation. Would they analyse it through a code of values, or see it as an opportunity to grasp a wider perspective in which a solution can be found? Would it affect them personally or would they view it impartially? Try to determine their point of view without passing judgment or comparing it to your own.

3. When having a conversation with a friend or relative, dedicate at least half of your time to finding out how the other person sees the world around them. Concentrate on really sensing the relationships within what they describe. Tell them how you see the world and compare. Ask questions about why things seem so to them.

4. Think of the people who are closest to you. As you think of each person, tell yourself “this person has their own life going on, and they are more concerned with their own life than they are with mine.” Remember that this doesn’t mean that they don’t care about you. It’s the natural order of things. Try to visualize what that person is seeing right now. What connections are they making or enacting, what thoughts are they having? Don’t pass judgment, or compare their situation to your own.

5. Try to identify the personality type of everyone that you come into contact with for any length of time.

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ISTP Personal Growth

ISTPs have trouble connecting with people due to their detached standpoint and only commit themselves when they have a personal stake in a situation. They tend to overlook routine needs or social responsibilities because of excessive attention paid to dispassionate analysis. They’re tendency to be noncommittal, indecisive, or procrastinate is driven by a tendency to search too long for the “perfect” answer or solution, sometimes putting off important tasks or problems until they become urgent.

ISTPs tend to have difficulty

describing their thought process in words. They generally stick to certain comfort zones or certain ways of doing something instead of understanding things from a variety of different perspectives. They have difficulty integrating knowledge that is perceived as “irrelevant” to their interests or skills. They should learn that making good choices involves accounting for how their own behaviors and emotions impact and intersect with the needs of everyone else involved.

ISTPs may unknowingly or uncaringly hurt people’s feelings

but can develop a better understanding of Fe as a decision-making Judging process by using it to understand relationships, rather than misinterpreting Fe as an emotion-based process to be avoided. It is important to understand that feelings/emotions are simply a source of inner guidance that help you stay in touch with your own well-being and that not everything in life can be explained by simple logic. People, including yourself, act irrationally at times and that’s okay.

When ISTPs feel insecure,

it is good to acknowledge and process negative emotions instead of trying to push them away. They can use Fe consciously to show appreciation and gratitude to others and to respond empathetically to people by thinking about how words/actions might affect them. Developing Fe can help support Ti by learning the benefits of social connection, teamwork, and belonging and help ISTPs understand that people, including themselves, are interdependent.

1. Don’t expect yourself to be a master at the “touchy-feely” game. Be yourself, but remember that there is a basic assumption of human decency that must be adhered to in relationships. If you’re not sure what that means, take special care to observe how people in “good” committed relationships behave towards each other, so that you can determine where the lines are drawn.

2. Pair yourself with an Extraverted Thinker (ESTJ or ENTJ) who is less likely to assume that the lack of feedback is the same thing as negative feedback.

3. Expanding your world and experiences will expand your understanding of human expectations. Try to figure out the personality type of people that you know and encounter in your life.

4. Don’t fear the unknown. You can handle it.

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ISFP Personal Growth

ISFPs often have difficulty with fitting in due to dismissing outside standards and feel adrift if they cannot express their values into the world. They may be unable to acknowledge or hear anything that goes against their personal ideas and opinions and sometimes blame their problems on other people, seeing themselves as victims. ISFPs tend to struggle with many inner conflicts or low self-esteem and can appear irrational, moody, selfish, or judgmental to others. They can counterbalance feelings of inadequacy by acknowledging their existing skills, and talents, and be more realistic about their goals/expectations in order to avoid undue stress/anxiety.

ISFPs may be uncomfortable with external structures,

and regulations and have difficulty understanding that making good choices involves using external standards and measurements of success/failure. They may rely too much on their own experience for interpreting external events and have difficulty integrating knowledge that falls outside of their own personal needs and experiences.

ISFPs can be too private,

inexpressive, and hard for others to know. They dislike being pigeonholed or wrongly judged and are easily offended if people do not share the same values. They may be extremely sensitive to any kind of criticism and ISFPs tend to have difficulty establishing predictable social interactions. They may at times be unaware of appropriate social behavior and oblivious to their personal appearance, or to appropriate dress. ISFPs can come across as eccentric, or perhaps even generally strange to others, without being aware of it.

ISFPs can use Te consciously

to develop good verbal critiquing skills and to discover/analyze logical connections, alternatives, or pros/cons. ISFPs should accept that they have a need for achievement and competence, and then work on building up the skills that are required to reach goals. They should avoid being too harsh on themselves and others by moderating their idealism through gathering more facts/details before making judgments.

Tips for ISFP Growth

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1. Take care to notice what people look like in different social situations. Look at their hair, their skin, their makeup (or lack thereof), their clothes, the condition of their clothes, their shoes, their facial expressions. Don’t compare others to your own appearance, or pass judgment on their appearance, simply take in the information.

2. Think of a situation in your life in which you weren’t sure how to behave. Now try to understand how one or two other people would see the situation. Don’t compare their behavior to your own, i.e. “she would know better than me what to do”, or “why is it so easy for her, but so hard for me”. Rather, try to understand how they would see the situation. Would it be seen as a problem, or as an opportunity? Would it be taken seriously or lightly? Try to determine their point of view without passing judgment or comparing it to your own.

3. When having a conversation with a friend or relative, dedicate at least half of your time to talking about the other person. Concentrate on really understanding where that person is coming from with their concerns. Ask questions.

4. Think of the people who are closest to you. As you think of each person, tell yourself “this person has their own life going on, and they are more concerned with their own life than they are with mine.” Remember that this doesn’t mean that they don’t care about you. It’s the natural order of things. Try to visualize what that person is doing right now. What things are they encountering, what thoughts are they having? Don’t pass judgment, or compare their situation to your own.

5. Try to identify the personality type of everyone that you come into contact with for any length of time.

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ESTP Personal Growth

Many ESTPs can become morose or even antagonistic in situations offering little promise of advantage or the possibility to “do something.” They may be manipulative, taking advantage of other people’s weaknesses for their own gain and can be unwilling or unable to plan anything in advance themselves, or to follow other’s careful plans. Without challenges of their own, they may become focused on the behavior of others, insisting that they live up to what the ESTP views as the standard level of accomplishment.

ESTPs can have a tendency toward misattributing meaning

when exploring and discussing confusing topics that are important to them. They may have difficulty maintaining employment for any length of time, losing credibility with potential employers or clients due to job hopping. They have difficulty seeing that their actions have wider or longer term implications and difficulty understanding what makes good choices existentially meaningful and significant.

ESTPs can be overconfident

of their own cunning or ability, ignoring problems which eventually catch up with them on their blind side. They tend to overlook personal needs/priorities because of excessive attention paid to external events and in relationship situations may be overbearing, demanding and/or uncaring of the feelings of their partner. They may become so engrossed in challenging activities that they lose all sense of proportion, neglecting themselves and their relationships.

When alone or in reduced circumstances

ESTPs may be subject to dark or morbid feelings about themselves. They have trouble grasping metaphorical, symbolic, or hidden meanings. They can use Ni consciously to reflect on goals and vision for the future and also to support Se by understanding how things/experiences are interconnected in meaningful ways. They may need to learn the value of structure and routine in producing the most desirable outcomes but when they feel life has become too structured or routine they should do something fun but also productive to shake things up.

1. Ask yourself what you want from a long term relationship. Now turn this around and see how your requirements compare with others. Are you being realistic? Have you forgotten to include the needs of others in your ideal relationship? Are you afraid of the things you need to offer, or are you just afraid that in offering them you will lose something?

2. Alwas remember, that a relationship which adds to your personal skills and life is a valuable one, while a relationship which limits your ability to be yourself is not going to work. Now try to see how your own demands and needs might add to another, and what they might take away from them.

3. Don’t be afraid of letting your feelings show, even if they frighten you for their weakness or showing your own vulnerability. More often than not, such honesty is the beginning of the kind of relationship that can lead you to grow.

4. Your best partner is going to be the one who fills your private space, your thinking space, as well as your senses. Try to talk to others about what you think. Discover yourself in your thoughts and let relationships grow through your letting the other person into your inner world. Discuss your fears and limits and discover the strength available to you from the support of another who may have what you need.

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ESFP Personal Growth

ESFPs can have skewed or unrealistic ideas about the feelings of others. They may have a tendency to blame their problems on the world at large, seeing themselves as underdogs battling against the odds. They may become totally self-focused and oblivious to the havoc they wreak on other’s feelings. They may also be seen as being unnecessarily coarse in their behavior and life choices.

ESFPs have trouble grasping metaphorical,

symbolic, or hidden meanings and tend to overlook personal needs/priorities because of excessive attention paid to external events. They have difficulty seeing the long term implications of their actions. ESFPs may be prone to believing irrational things and rationalize the ways of the world in the most inane or simplistic ways. They can be prone to restlessness and get easily bored, needing situations to move quickly with enough variety in order to stay interested.

ESFPs may be unable to acknowledge

or hear anything that would lead to second thoughts and may perceive even the most careful and objective criticism as simply a ploy to spoil their enjoyment of life. They tend not handle or tolerate feelings of anxiety or inadequacy very well but have trouble recognizing their limitations when they are overstimulated and close to exhaustion.

ESFPs need to understand the value of structure and routine

in producing the most desirable outcomes and when they feel life has become too structured or routine they should do something fun but also productive to change things up. ESFPs need to take responsibility for their mistakes and work to improve upon them. They can use Ni consciously to reflect on goals and visions for the future and also in support of Se in understanding how things/experiences are interconnected in meaningful ways.

Tips For ESFP Growth

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1. When a new prospect enters your life and stirs your appetite, sit with it for a moment in your mind and allow yourself to notice whether you have a lurking judgement about it. Try to allow this judgement to come forward on its own behalf and do not try to rationalize it nor be afraid of it. Imagine that you are hearing this judgement from the lips of another person, or perhaps from God, anything to let it be felt objectively within your mind. What is your Feeling function saying about what your exciting new prospect really means to you?

2. Think of a situation in your life in which you are sharing your joys and enthusiasms with others, perhaps entertaining them. Perhaps you are an entertainer. Watch the looks and body language of others as you speak or perform and notice that not all seem to be offering the same emotional responses to your words or actions. Each one is feeling you a different way, judging you a different way. Try to notice the same function within yourself now, the responsive person within you who is also judging your words and actions. How is he/she reacting to you?

3. When having a conversation with a friend or relative, dedicate at least half of your time to discovering their values and reasons. Concentrate on really understanding why they feel as they do. Ask questions, and take some time later to ask those same questions of yourself.

4. Think of the people who are closest to you. As you think of each person, tell yourself “this person has their own life going on, and they are more concerned with their own life than they are with mine.” Remember that this doesn’t mean that they don’t care about you. It’s the natural order of things. Try to visualize what that person is doing right now. What are they feeling, what judgments are they possibly making about what is happening to them? Don’t compare their situation to your own, just try to discover how you would feel in their situation.

5. Try to identify the personality type of everyone that you come into contact with for any length of time.

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• Emotional Triggers of Each MBTI Type
• The Moral Compass of Each MBTI Type
• How Each Myers Briggs Type Reacts To Conflict
• How Each Myers Briggs Type Sabotages Themselves