Gemini and Cancer Love & Friendship
Gemini and Cancer are one after the other in the zodiac. This gives them a few things in common, particularly their need to be in close communication with their people. However, they are markedly different. These two will have to do a lot of work to make a relationship work because they value different things.
Gemini is an air sign: brainy, intelligent, and inquisitive. Cancer is a water sign: nurturing, protective, and home-bodied. Gemini is more cerebral whereas Cancer is more emotional. These two have different modes of expression, and work in the world in different ways. However, if they learn each other’s languages, respect each other, and understand there is more than one way to be in this life, they can move beyond their initial differences.
Cancer-Gemini Friendship: Finding common ground.
Gemini and Cancer like to stick to the places they know, and they tend to make friends early on and keep them for life. They also tend to make friends out of family. Thus, it’s entirely possible that Gemini and Cancer meet as children or grow up together and keep this friendship going through adulthood because they want to be around people who know them.
However, familiarity isn’t always enough to overlook the problems that can occur in this relationship. Cancer is more emotional and needs more emotional support, whereas Gemini needs more understanding and intellectual stimulation. Cancer is a cardinal sign, and Gemini is a mutable sign. Gemini can bend to whatever Cancer wants, who may be more demanding of its friends. On the other hand, Gemini’s need to talk and socialize can make it difficult to keep a secret or to not bring up in conversation what Cancer would prefer to keep private. Gemini doesn’t take certain matters as seriously as Cancer does. Gemini could make a joke about something Cancer holds dear and not understand why Cancer might be upset about that.
The real trouble begins when there’s a disagreement. Cancer reacts on instinct and seeks to protect itself. Gemini, on the other hand, is more willing to talk things out in a rational manner. Cancer can react strongly, letting the ends justify the means, while Gemini is gobsmacked and left wondering why they’re on the other end of Cancer’s anger or tears. Cancer may sulk off alone and ignore Gemini out of self-protection, giving Gemini the silent treatment. This is perhaps one of the harshest things someone can do to Gemini: alienate them and refuse to talk or even to say what the problem is. Of course, the more Gemini refuses to take Cancer’s feelings seriously, the more likely the silent treatment becomes permanent.
A friendship built on common ground can survive these differences, and it has to be something strong, like family, or sharing a place of origin. The more shared memories and experiences, the more the two can understand each other. While there is an irony in saying that the best way to ensure this friendship is to ensure it’s an old friendship, it’s actually true: the earlier in life these two become friends, the easier it is to stay friends.
Gemini-Cancer Dating: Air + water = evaporation.
Gemini needs a buddy or sibling, and Cancer needs a spouse or a parent. Understanding that Gemini and Cancer have to grow together to understand each other, dating can be a bit tricky, because there’s a good chance these two won’t hit it off at first. Imagine the two of them meeting at a party: Gemini wants to stay, but Cancer wants to go somewhere quieter. Cancer finds Gemini’s extroversion garrulous or perhaps even haughty, especially if Gemini uses their wits to attempt to impress. Gemini finds Cancer whiny and boring, especially if Cancer is insistent on being home or having peace and quiet. However, it’s not entirely hopeless, if they’re willing to compromise.
The attraction: [If it’s a Gemini Sun and Cancer Sun person in question, then there’s a good chance that the attraction is stronger if one or both of them have Venus in the other’s sign, as in Gemini Sun with Venus in Cancer and Cancer Sun with Venus in Gemini. The attraction is even stronger if this the case for both people.]
These two have talents the other may not have. Gemini is brainy, quick, and detached, and Cancer is imaginative, sentimental, and nurturing. Cancer knows what other people need and what will make them feel secure. Gemini knows how things work and can pull information from anywhere and apply it in any situation. The older they get, the more likely each one is able to see what they lack and to appreciate these traits in the other. Together, it may seem as if they have all their bases covered.
The longevity: For Gemini, love means being curious about what makes the other person happy and finding all of those little things. For Cancer, love means nurturing and protecting someone, giving them a warm place to hide from the world. For both Gemini and Cancer, longevity depends on how much they’re willing to change. For both signs, there’s a likelihood that they come together and stay together because they have grown used to each other and the history they have is important.
Even though Gemini finds new things fascinating, it doesn’t necessarily have to have them; flirting is not as big a deal to Gemini as it is to Cancer who needs a commitment. Cancer doesn’t date so much as it courts, as in needing to find a spouse. Gemini, on the other hand, needs a best friend, and girlfriend and boyfriend make sense. The concept of “spouse,” on the other hand, isn’t so clear. Gemini may want to marry to keep the relationship going, whereas Cancer may marry to become family.
Gemini-Cancer Marriage: Make love grow.
If Cancer and Gemini make it down the aisle, the hard part is probably over…probably. While Cancer usually takes marriage very seriously, it’s prone to flights and fancy and may become infatuated and really, truly believe they’ve found The One and no one can convince them otherwise, so why wait? Cancer probably wouldn’t elope or marry without friends and family to witness, but there’s a chance these two might marry not so much impulsively, but convince themselves it’s a good idea before they’ve had a lot of time to consider it.
This doesn’t mean that there may be no misunderstandings. Gemini fears alienation as much as Cancer does, but not in the same way. Cancer needs to belong to people, whether they understand each other, whereas Gemini needs to have people to talk to. Cancer is more family-oriented, and Gemini is more friend-oriented. Gemini needs to go out with the guys or girls separate from Cancer, who finds this alienating, and Cancer needs to be sentimental, which Gemini finds pointless.
By the time they are married, Gemini and Cancer should have figured out that giving each other space to be Gemini and Cancer is the best bet for a long-term relationship. Gemini should be free to get drunk and dance on the table at the holiday party, and Cancer should be free to decorate every square inch of the house for Christmas, no matter how much the other would prefer it not happen.
The thing that would most likely make a Gemini and Cancer marriage last is enter the marriage wanting children and in fact have children. Cancer is the sign of the mother and child dynamic, and Gemini rules small people (children). They can both take delight in raising their children and watching them blossom into unique people who grow up and do their own things.
The Karmic Lesson: Learning to be community together.
Gemini and Cancer come together to learn something from the other, and that is how to be part of a community, even if it’s just the two of them, and to use that to become part of the community around them. Gemini, the sign of communication, brings people together by communicating. Cancer brings them together through proximity and biology. Together, they can create a more harmonious community than either can do alone if they learn to appreciate what the other brings to the table. Sometimes, hotheaded Cancer can use Gemini’s cool-headed perspective. Sometimes, detached Gemini could use a shove to get more emotionally involved in what is important.
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Jhoon is a writer and artist who likes to study astrology and psychology. Astroligion.com was launched in 2016 with a focus on astrology but has since expanded to include the MBTI and other topics. This site has provided Jhoon a great incentive to research and learn more about many subjects of personal interest.