33 Signs You Haven't Gotten Over Your Ex (and what to do about it)

image credit: Olaia Irigoien

If you’re anything like the average person, your break-up was probably pretty tough. And even though it’s been a while, you might still find yourself thinking about your ex from time to time. But how can you tell if you’re really over them? Here are 33 signs that you haven’t quite moved on:

1. You keep a photo of them in your wallet “just in case.”

2. You still know all of their passwords.

3. You have their Spotify log-in saved on your phone.

4. You still wear the watch they got you for your birthday.

5. You’ve saved every single text message they ever sent you.

6. You still have their number saved in your phone as “the cutest boy/girl ever!”

7. You check their social media accounts daily, even though you’re not friends with them anymore.

8. You’ve cried yourself to sleep more times than you can count since the breakup.

9. You’ve considered getting back together with them more times than you can count since the breakup.

10. You constantly compare every new person you meet to them and no one measures up.

11. Your friends are sick of hearing you talk about your ex and what they did wrong.

12. You haven’t been on a date since the breakup because you’re “not ready yet.”

13. When someone mentions their name, you have to walk away or change the subject because it’s too painful to talk about them.

14. Seeing them happy with someone else feels like a punch to the gut.

15. You still have hope that someday they’ll realize they made a mistake and come back to you.

16. You’ve replayed your last conversation with them over and over again in your head, trying to figure out where things went wrong.

17. You’ve Googled their name to see if they’re dating anyone new.

18. You’ve looked through old photos of the two of you and gotten teary-eyed.

19. You’ve accidentally liked one of their Instagram photos from nine months ago.

20. You still know all the words to the songs that were playing during key moments in your relationship.

21. You’ve considered getting their name tattooed on you, just so you’ll never forget them.

22. You have a Pinterest board dedicated to your wedding with them, even though you know it will never happen.

23. You constantly compare your current partner to them, even though you know it’s not fair.

24. You still have their clothes and refuse to get rid of them.

25. You’ve looked through your ex’s things when they weren’t home, just to feel closer to them.

26. You’ve considered driving by their house or workplace, just to see them.

27. You’ve accidentally said your ex’s name during sex with your current partner.

28. You keep their things because you can’t bear to part with them, even though they’re just physical objects.

29. You’ve cried over your ex more times than you can count.

30. You’ve looked up their new partner on social media and compared yourself to them.

31. You still wear the clothes they gifted you, even though they’re totally not your style.

32. Every time you see something that reminds you of them, your heart sinks.

33. You still love them, even though you know it’s not healthy.

If you can relate to any (or all) of the above, then it’s pretty safe to say that you’re not over your ex just yet. And that’s OK! It takes time to get over someone, especially if the relationship was significant and long-lasting. Just try to be patient with yourself and understand that it’s normal to still have some lingering feelings. In the meantime, here are a few tips on how to deal:

Even though you may be trying your best to move on, it’s clear that you’re still not over your ex. Whether it’s the fact that you still keep pictures of them hidden in your room or the fact that you can’t help but stalk their social media accounts, there are a number of signs that indicate you’re not as over them as you may think. If you find yourself exhibiting any of these signs, it’s important to take a step back and reassess your situation. Maybe you’re not as ready to move on as you thought you were. Or maybe there’s still a part of you that wants to hold onto the past. Either way, it’s important to be honest with yourself and figure out what you really want. Only then will you be able to truly move on from your ex.

The first step is admitting that you’re still hung up on your ex. If you find yourself constantly thinking about them, or looking at old photos and reminiscing about the good times, then it’s time to take action. The next step is to delete their number from your phone. This may seem like a small thing, but it’s an important symbolic gesture that will help you to move on. After that, it’s time to make a clean break and stop following them on social media. Seeing their happy posts and pictures will only make it harder for you to forget about them. Finally, try to occupy your time with other things. Spend time with your friends, take up a new hobby, or travel to a new place. By keeping yourself busy, you’ll eventually be able to move on from your ex and start anew. Here are 5 tips to remember:

1.) Give yourself time to grieve. Breakups are hard, and it’s normal to feel sad, angry, and even scared. Don’t try to bottle up your emotions – cry if you need to, or punch a pillow (but not your ex’s face).

2.) Cut off contact. This means no texting, no Snapchatting, no stalking their social media, and definitely no drunken late-night calls. Out of sight, out of mind.

3.) Make a clean break. Delete their number from your phone, unfollow them on social media, and return any belongings they may have left at your place. The sooner you can erase them from your life, the better.

4.) surround yourself with positive people. Now is not the time to isolate yourself – reach out to friends and family members who will make you feel good about yourself. And if you need to, seek professional help to deal with the emotions you’re experiencing.

5.) Focus on taking care of yourself. Now is the time to focus on YOU. Eat healthy, exercise, get enough sleep, and do things that make you happy. This is not the time to wallow in self-pity – remember that you are worth taking care of.

No one said getting over an ex would be easy, but it is possible. Just take it one day at a time, and eventually, you’ll get there. And when you do, you’ll be stronger and better for it.

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Jetta Moon

Jetta Moon is an artist, writer and astrology blogger with a passion for creativity and psychology. He is also an enthusiast of MBTI theory and loves to research and write about what he learns. Jetta's background in creative writing has helped develop a unique and insightful perspective on the zodiac, which he shares with readers of this blog.